Weekend Crush: Johnny Weir

Johnny Weir (c) VancityAllie
CC Attribution 2.0 License

I almost have to look away when I see Johnny Weir oozing pure sex on the ice. Almost. Except that this is completely impossible through an awesome combination of glitter, sequins, and crazy jumps. Then there's the flexy, oh wow is he flexible!

He's unapologetically himself. Period. I bet there are judges out there that wish they could nab him on an infraction--wardrobe malfunction, anything!--and scrape his sexy self off the ice. Even though he's typically covered head to toe, sometimes with a little extra as a showy collar cuff, he may as well be naked. This tickles me so much because figure skating has a history of being a bit dry. See the Debi Thomas rule for reference. (This banned unitards until 2005 because Debi was "showing too much" in her sexy little number.) I have to say Johnny far out-sexies her within 10 seconds of any given performance. As we pole dancers know wearing sparse fabric does not make the sexy--
Johnny Weir is probably more of a stripper than most pole dancers I know would ever be. Take note *ahem* certain organizations trying to kill stripper connotations through clothing rules.

Seeing Johnny perform is mesmerizing. I imagine that he is most himself on the ice, nailing uber fast jumps wish sexy swagger. In a word: expressive. No one could ever watch him and complain that all he focuses on is technical elements and high-point jumps. In that way he is so much like my first figure skating love. I also doubt anyone could really embody a Lady Gaga song like he does, see the video below. In fact, he's a huge fan. I wonder why. lol.


In addition to being a stage costume connoisseur he is mad disciplined. For instance, he appeared on Chopped and flaunted some pretty awesome cooking skills. And some awesome, disco-ball-esque kicks, of course. But I digress.  His one weak point was that he kept cooking too healthy! He must just live for figure skating, eating these incredibly well made meals made for training. Could you imagine having him cook for you? Delicious food and balanced diets served with glitter. For all the pizzazz in his performances he would not be where he is if not for being dedicated. Johnny Weir learned to figure skate on his family's farm land--he froze himself a rink. It goes to show that you can be a technical genius and express yourself. I hope to one day do the same in my own, comparatively bland style.